Do I have the right to tell someone to do something if I don’t know the back story?

I met with my friend today; we haven’t seen each other in awhile. In passing, saying hello, but nothing more than that.
She asked me the other day if I wanted to hang out and of course I said yes. I have been hearing through the ‘grape vine’ that she really hasn’t been in a good place lately. And I wanted to get her side of the story and have a heart to heart. I am a “ready to jump in guns blazing” kind of girl when it comes to my friends. I will always have their back and give them advice even though I might not be qualified to do so.
Which brings me to my point, have you ever gone in to a situation with your mind made up about what you’re going to talk about? I went in with a mindset that “this” was bothering her, but in fact it was “that”. Man did I ever feel silly. That’s what you get from listening to the ‘grape vine’
So after I finally stopped talking and listened to what was really bothering her then that back story came to the surface.  She has been very stressed out about debt. She is one of the hardest working people I know; she works two jobs and most of the time on the same day. That would stress me out too, working 20 hours a day. And she feels that she is losing herself, she wanted to ask me what her hobbies used to be. That just broke my heart, I have been in that place and it’s really hard to get out of.
I have been having huge problems with this lately and it has been bringing me closer to God. In letting me step back and realize that he has a plan for me and I don’t have to worry about it. But with her it has torn her farther away from God. She used to be very religious and I was always the standoffish one, and it has seemed that we have switched.
I wasn’t sure what to tell her, I didn’t want to preach to her or have her feel award. Where is the line? Now I think I am the one that needs advice, What should I do….
I told her to just think happy thoughts and good things will happen.  To not look at the negatives but to try and find the positives no matter how bleak the situation seems. Like with debt don’t think about how much you have, focus on the fact that you made a $50.00 payment on it. Simple things like that, have been slowly changing me, I just hope it works for her.
I just kept thinking to myself, I need to pray about this, I need God to help her. Even though she doesn’t realize it, she is worthy. Jesus died for all our sins big and small and he loves all of us.
I ask you to help me pray to the lord today:

DearLord: I ask that you please shine your light on her and show her that she is worthy of your love. That you will help her to find herself again, Oh Lord. Help her with her debt so she can slow down and enjoy the wonderful life that you have blessed her with. Thank you Lord –Amen

Please send a prayer out to her today, and pray that she will let him back in to her heart again. Thank you everyone

Don’t forget to smile!


  1. I think you gave her great advice, and you're good and right to be that listening ear, also to pray for her and ask others to pray. I prayed your little prayer for her. How was your Bible study?

    1. Bible Study is tomorrow night! He said they are in Acts 3. I will let you know how it goes!

    2. I was blessed to attend a class on Acts 20 on Sunday. How did it go?

  2. deff will be praying for her! Debt is such a difficult thing to deal with it can keep you feeling bogged down and depressed >.< as for advice, I don't know what exactly you should tell her except that you're praying for her, and then also pray to the Lord about what you should say. But remember sometimes a listener helps just as much as an advice-giver :) good luck! And prayers to you and your friend

  3. We're praying with you, friend! :)

  4. Will join you in prayer for her. One of the best things we can do is pray for our friends. Reach out to the very throne of God and intercede on their behalf. The fact that she knows you are there for her means a whole lot!




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